Married couples can divorce each other, but if they have children, they are not divorcing them, and both will remain their parents forever. Ideally both parents will continue to have a close relationship with their minor children. This means putting aside their personal grievances with each other and learning what co-parenting is all about.
What is Co-Parenting?
The word co-parenting means sharing responsibilities for decision-making for minor children. It can mean decision making regarding education, extracurricular activities, religion, and medical treatment. Co-parenting duties may continue for the children even after they have completed high school, gone to college, and beyond.
At Bruckner Hernandez Legal Solutions, through the Collaborative Divorce process, we work with our clients, many times along with a divorce coach, so that even parents who are upset with each other can work through their emotions and ultimately create a customized parenting plan which best meets their children’s needs and the needs of the family overall.
The Collaborative Divorce process helps parents be future-focused, forward-thinking, and to develop strategies for communicating with one another about their children. We help them acknowledge the emotional aspect of the situation in order to work through their differences in order to cooperatively make parenting decisions together going forward.
We encourage parents to use as their motto, “We are ‘Team Our Child’” If each parent can remember to let their child know that they are all on the same team, their child(ren) will learn that they all remain forever family, even if the structure of the family has changed.
Why is Co-Parenting Important?
One thing most parents agree on: their children are wonderful. Amazing even. They share a love for their child or children. If they stay in that frame of mind, they can get beyond their differences with each other and make decisions for their children’s future.
Decades and decades of research shows that most of the time, children are better served when they have both parents making decisions for them and influencing their lives. If the children can see that their parents are still on the same team regarding their care, even if their parents are no longer married and no longer live together, it makes a significant difference in the children’s lives.
Co-parenting never puts the children in the middle. Your children will not have to worry about, “Which parent is coming to my graduation?” “Which parent is coming to my wedding?”
Co-parents work together, so you both will attend the same graduation ceremony. You both attend the wedding. You both attend the flag football game. You both attend the school open house. Your children need you both, and as co-parents, it is important to meet that need.
For assistance in making co-parenting work for you, or for any aspect of your divorce and/or parenting issues, contact us at Bruckner Hernandez Legal Solutions.